
Most of Ilene Backsman’s life is lived within a 11-foot by 12-foot room.
At 94 years old, Backsman, who has cancer, faces her own mortality every day.
She can no longer walk on her own, instead needing the aid of a cane, to carefully move from her reading chair to her bed, two feet away. She said she used to weigh a healthy 170 pounds, but because she has a tough time eating, now weighs a fragile 98 pounds. Backsman is constantly connected via clear tubes to an oxygen tank which emits a low buzz from the corner of the room to help her breathe easier.
But Backsman is not troubled.
She is content with her life.
“I’ve been out (in the world) for many years, so now I’m in for a few,” Backsman said as she laughed.
One of those times “out” was in 1936 when she traveled from her home in Kentucky to New York City to experience New Year’s Eve in Times Square. “It was the highlight of my life,” Backsman said. She so enjoyed being around many people celebrating the start of a fresh year.
To this day, she still watches the ball drop, only Backsman sees it the next morning because she goes to bed about 10 p.m. For her, New Year’s Eve is for a younger generation and those who are still in their dating years.
Backsman relocated to Naples in 1958 after her husband at the time, Raymond Gilb, suggested they see what the up-and-coming city was all about. Backsman initially didn’t want to move, but the self-described traveler couldn’t resist the adventure. The family moved several times within the city limits through the years, but never left after arriving.
“I’ve lived in every place in Naples except for Port Royal,” Backsman joked.
For a time, Backsman worked as a proofreader at the Naples Daily News, when it was located in Crayton Cove before moving in 1969 to Central Avenue.
“Everyday was something different,” Backsman said. “And I only sat in the office.”
But despite switching jobs and homes, Backsman has planted roots in the city, with two kids, five grandkids and 12 great gran
dkids. She lives with one of her daughters, Melinda Beatty, and most of her extended family still lives within driving distance.
“I think that’s why I was made to live so long,” Backsman said. “To love all my kids.”
Beatty backs up that sentiment. “She’s always been supportive of her family,” Beatty said.
But as Backsman took care of Beatty when she was a child, Beatty now has the opportunity to show her mother the same kind of regard she received.
“The roles have been reversed over the last couple years,” Beatty said. “I think that she deserves this. She’s been a good mom, she’s helped us all along and watched out for us and now it’s our turn to look out for her.”
In her dim
ly lit room, Backsman sits on the edge of her bed, her hands pressed against the worn fabric of an old flower print quilt. She wears a red sweater and has her hair neatly brushed. Next to her, AVOW Hospice Reiki Master and massage therapist Rosemary Lowe lightly rubs Backsman’s shoulder and back, working out tightness. It’s some of the most exercise Backsman gets now.
The only traveling Backsman does is through the fictional characters in her novels. It isn’t lonely, just more secluded. She doesn’t like to reflect too much, not because it bothers her, but because she’s focused on her next daily task. She still has her morning coffee with her daughter and a chat about the topic of the day.
“I never expected to live so long, I didn’t want to live this long,” Backsman said. “But altogether I’d say I’ve lived a pretty great life.”
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